In the name of Allah, The Beneficent, The Merciful..
O Allah I'm scared..
You'd gave me everything I desired in this life.. at least until now.. As your servant, I am pleased.. I'm happy yet petrified as I know every people will be confronted by any kind of test from Allah to diminish their former sins and to make them realize in every single day what the purpose of life.. As stated in HIS holy Quran, there is no easy way to be rewarded JANNAH..
I just scared to be me.. The lucky me.. I've been blessed by a perfect family who always be by my side in any situations.. The loved one who is perpetually waiting for me regardless of my weaknesses.. Friends, true friends who willingly share my felicity and misery.. I am here now, the place I dream to be.. The place where I want to gain as much knowledge as I can.. Even it nearly end of my 2nd year in The University of Manchester, I still can't believe the building I saw last year in the undergraduate prospectus book is the building that I see everyday on my way to school!!! Subhanallah...
O Allah.. I'm obliged..
I'm not the one that You can be proud of.. I am NOT yet.. But I am trying.. Please show me the way.. Thank you for answering all my prayers.. And the current miracle is my results.. The results I received last Thursday is not what I expected.. It was NOT good.. and it was not bad either.. From my effort, I couldn't get that marks.. I was really effortless in my previous semester.. But I prayed for the best and hope Allah grant my wish to give me miracle this time.. Give me one more chance to proceed my journey in this beautiful place and I promise to work much more harder after this.. and... HE let me see the miracle!! again.. Thank you Allah.. You love me so much.. But.. what have I done for You in return??? nothing..
Above all this I'm terrified..
Life is not a delightful fantasy but reality.. It is the real examinations on the stage called world..It will be one day.. The day I'll face the tremendous test from HIM... Everyday, I smile to be born as Nurulain Baharuddin.. But, at the same time I'll hear voices from the bottom of my heart reminding me not easily drown in comfortableness and always be prepared for obstacles waiting ahead.. The results of the hardship that will accompany me in the hereafter... The moment when we meet the Lord of this universe... It is to him we belong and to him is our final return.
I'm just scared..
But, we are not alone.. He's always there with us.. He listen our prayers..
Just remember, everything that happens
in life must have its own lesson,
even though we sometimes fail to figure them out...