Monday, August 9, 2010

~I'm writing this with tears~



There were few readers who kindly spared their times to email me and advised me not to stop blogging and share stories about my life as my stories more or less have inspired them to move on and find their own admirable happiness.. Thank you so much for the compliments.. I'm proudly say that all your responds and feedback have made my day and I feel overwhelmed about it.. But it has been ages since my last entry and I'm very sorry for that... I'm still here but every time I looked at the screen, there was no amusing story came out to compose.. I'm currently in depressing and stressful mood that lead to no ideas and strength at all.. All the passion had flown away and me myself not happy about it..

A lot of things happened out of sudden just after a week I came back from Manchester for a summer holidays.. One of the most is my mother's diseasedness.. Everybody keep asking me about her conditions and some times I felt like nothing to say.. It needs a lot of explanations both scientifically and mystically.. Until now, the specialists can't exactly explain with medical prove about what is happening.. She keeps vomiting and loss her appetite and at least a month since she constantly like that.. Can you imagine how weak she could be?? She couldn't sleep at night as well, and always need some one by her side to 'usek-usek' or 'tepuk-tepuk' her body and cuddle her like a baby.. She 'gelisah' all the time and will feel hot sometimes and freezing cold the other time.. She's very weak and hungry but can't help herself to eat anything.. She needs assistance to walk and to take a bath.. She cried all the time and said that she couldn't take it anymore..For me as her daughter, my brothers and sisters, my father as her husband who has struggle so much, we don't have enough strength to see her suffering like that for any longer..

O Allah.. Please give us courage..
I know, this is just a tiny assessment from You for our family..

But please ease her pain..

My mother is an amazing, kindhearted,
indulgence, and loving mother..
but, where is she now? T_T
She love to eat everything and will always
ask my father to bring us to wherever
place in Jalan-Jalan Cari Makan..
But where is she now?? T_T

My family and I have tried both modern and traditional remedy to ensure she will be my mother again.. We went to KPJ (the doctor has no effort to find the solution and the nurses were rude like no training at all!!!) and now she currently admitted at Prince Court Medical Centre (there are about 5 doctors get together to find the solutions for my mother's weird illnesses until today and I frankly speaking will give 5 stars to the nurses.. ) At least, I feel relieve as she is in a very good supervision.. Not to forget about the traditional remedy, we already went to almost 6 Ustazs including Darussyifa' and my mother is still like that.. They said that someone have send very strong 'sihir' to her and at the mean time, there are 'saka' from our ancestors as well..I don't know who send the 'sihir' and I don't know what kind of saka are they.. But most of the time I feel like my mother was turn to a baby.. Is it a baby saka? and how bout the sihir? personally, I think the mission of the sihir is to stop my mother from eat anything and to kill her slowly.. Its kind of bullshit sometimes, but it is the truth and even said in Al-Quran about the existence of these creatures and their aim to spoiled the prophet Adam a.s's generations..

We never stop praying and ask Allah to ease my mother's pain and stop the burden on her shoulder.. Whatever it is, there will always reasons behind it.. Thinking about positive side, people who suffer is the lucky one and among the chosen one as Allah give them chances to settle everything before going back to meet Him.. He give them chances to meet Him in a very clean condition as pure as a baby, directly to His promising paradise.. A paradise where is absence of evil, the home of peace for those who are loved by Allah..

This pain is nothing compared to the punishment in the hereafter, and the pain is nothing compared to His delightful Jannah in return..

But...

I miss my beautiful and chubby mommy...
I miss my caring mommy who always care and worried for me..
I miss my mommy who always ask me what to eat next even I was still full..
But there is no more..
Tomorrow, is the beginning of Ramadhan, the fasting month..
But I have to cook by myself and think about 'juadah berbuka' by myself..
I miss my mommy.. Please come back and stop my tears..

I'm not that strong but I'll stay strong for you mommy..
Physically, I look good but nobody knows what is inside..
I love you so much MAK..

And the readers as well, please pray for her..
My family and I really need the du'a..
We really do..

Thank you for reading..

Assalammualaikum.. :-)

With Love,

Monday, May 10, 2010

~ask yourself~


There was a status in facebook couple days ago posted by one of my former high school friends that made me think...

'Nak tukar imej la.. nk fully bertudung.. ok tak ??'

Just wondering.. Why do some people have to ask others opinion for that kind of decision? and the question is more about beauty of wearing the hijab itself, rather than what Allah told us to do and the consequences behind it.. Why doesn't she just ask herself the basic question of what the changes have to do with her own religion at the very first place?

Is it because of your Creator or, is it because of what people say...

If the majority told her that 'tak cun la ko pakai tudung'... So??

just ask yourself..



Wednesday, April 21, 2010

~SABAR~



Assalammualaikum WBT..

Rasanya agak lama tak post kan apa-apa dalam blog ni..

I suppose to be busy as the final examinations just around the corner and just a month from today!! But, as usual, my ideas become plenty when it comes to 'takda masa' plus something that happened recently..

I would like to mention about 'Hikmah' of Allah's planning towards myself.. He gave me a chance which cause a huge impact to my personality of being a better muslim woman.. He gave me opportunity to discover different exposures and colorful experiences in this British land..The Hikmah that I was mentioning is the bond of sisters in Islam..

I realized about the importance of our very own religion once I got here.. How's nice isn't it??
away from my own country which is an Islamic country at least by name, I learn lots of things here..

Kali ni nak cerita tentang maksud persaudaraan dalam Islam..

"You will not enter paradise until you
believe, and you will
not believe until you love one another."
(Sahih Muslim)

Dulu.. aku tak berani nak mention pasal agama bila memikirkan kekurangan yang ada dalam diri ni.. Bukan ustazah yang penuh ilmu didada.. Bukan alim ulama yang petah berkata-kata... Bukan manusia sempurna kurng dari dosa.. Tapi disini aku belajar tentang bertapa perlunya kita menyebar kan apa yang kita tahu..

Sabda Rasulullah SAW : Sampaikanlah agamaku walaupun sepotong ayat..

InsyaALLAH..

Disini.. Di bumi uk ni, di Manchester, aku belajar banyak perkara.. Paling utama dan ketara ialah tentang kepentingan agama kita sendiri dan bertapa negara aku yang tercinta sangat2 perlu di bimbangkan.. Di sini juga aku belajar tentang persaudaraan sesama Islam yang sungguh berbeza.. Persaudaraan seperti keluarga yang sgt3 rapat.. Subhanallah..

Hampir setahun aku di sini.. takda lansung dengki mendengki sesame manusia.. takda lansung timbul sape lebih, sape kurang.. 'ishh.. x bole tgk la die ni lebih dari aku'... tiada same sekali.. aku sungguh terharu.. masing2 bantu membantu.. coursework, siap tanye kalau ada ape2 masalah bagi tahu nanti akan cuba di bantu.. Kerja dalam group pulak, seorang ada masalah tak buat keje ke ape.. 10 reasons yang positive akan di ambil kira dahulu sebelom menyalah kan sesuatu pihak.. mencari salah orang tu option yang terakhir.. MasyaALLAH.. berbeza nya Ya ALLAH..

Aku bersyukur kepadamu Ya Allah kerana engkau memberi aku peluang & pengalaman yang tidak bole di beli dengan wang ringgit.. Kau beri aku masa 3 tahun belajar dan mempunyai pengalaman di Malaysia ketika diploma dan Kau juga beri aku peluang menjejak kan kaki merasakan pengalaman belajar di luar negara supaya aku sendiri berupaya untuk NAMPAK dan membuat perbezaan.. Bukan aku mengagung2 kan negara luar sehingga lupa daratan, tapi apa yang ingin aku sampai kan sekarang ialah tentang mentality masyarakat Melayu/Islam di Malaysia dengan mentality masyarakat melayu + Islam dari Malaysia + Islam dari tempat lain + non-muslims yang hormat orang lain..

Sebelum ada yang salah faham, ingin aku bagi tahu di sini tentang apa yang aku cerita ni hanya la dalam skop pengalaman aku sendiri.. bukan semua masyarakat melayu/Islam di Malaysia begitu.. ini hanya apa yang aku nampak.. Ramai yang tidak begitu tapi Allah takdir kan aku tidak berjumpa dgn mereka di Malaysia..

Suatu hari, course mate aku dari Qatar dapat solutions untuk past years, solutions untuk Course works dan macam2 lagi.. Tiba2 dia call bagi tahu yang dia dah siap fotostat kan dan kawan aku sorang lagi tolong hantarkan ke bilik.. bukan siket tapi, ada jugak sampai 100 lebeh muke surat..

Sem lepas, time tengah struggle giler study last minutes, tetibe coursemate aku dari pakistan pulak call kalau2 aku memerlukan apa2 pertolongan.. kalau ada, dia akan scan kan jawapan dan email kan kat aku supaya aku dapat study.. kalau still tak faham, miscall je dia, nanti dia akan call balik ajar aku..

Time nak buat course work pulak, masing2 akan call sesama sendiri bertanya kalau2 perlukan bantuan.. tak sedikit pon kesah pasal takut orang ni dapat markah lebih atau ape.. masing2 berusaha untuk sama2 berjaya!!!!!!!

Rakan2 aku yang non-muslims pula.. Mereka sgt3 hormati aku dan rakan2 seIslam yang lain.. selalu je datang lepak2 kat bilik aku ni bersembang.. ada jugak coursemate aku yang nonmuslim dari Israel, brunei, nak ajar aku subjek yang aku tak faham.. sayang mereka.. sungguh prihatin.. :-)

aku terharuuuuu.. ;-(

Rakan2 sesama Malaysian pula pun begitu.. Berpesan2 sesama sendiri untuk sentiasa menjaga diri dan jika ada sebarang masalah jangan segan2 untuk berkongsi.. setiap minggu juga akan ade perjumpaan untuk membersihkan diri atau dalam erti kata lain memberi pengisian rohani kepada diri masing.. Berceritakan pengalaman, mengaji Al Quran, mengupas tafsir Al Quran, Menghayati kisah2 Nabi terdahulu dan kisah2 sahabat yang bole dijadikan tauladan, beriadah bersama2, makan bersama2 supaya ukhuwah itu sentiasa erat dan masing2 tidak akan berasa keseorang di bumi yang asing dan jauh dari keluarga ini.. Kami juga sentiasa berkumpul untuk membincangkankan tentang isu semasa dan tujuan hidup serta tanggungjawab yang besar bagi seorang yang memegang nama Islam tersebut.. Memikirkan bagaimana untuk menjadikan Islam itu tiang dan tunjang dalam setiap individu..

bukan sekadar Islam pada nama.. Bukan sekadar bertudung litup..

Cantiknya Islam itu membentukkan persaudaraan..

Setiap kali aku merasakan nikmat dan manisnye kehidupan disini, aku jadi sedih bila teringat kisah2 aku terdahulu... Juga kisah2 yang di ceritakan oleh kawan2 lama ku di Malaysia ketika sekali sekala berpeluang untuk chat..sentiasa masalah yang sama berbangkit2, berulang2.. takda perubahan dengan sebelom aku pergi dan selepas aku pergi.. sama.. gado, masam muka, sound secara kasar..

Kenapa kita lebih suka memikirkan CARA yang menyakitkan saudara kita sendiri daripada memikirkan jalan yang lebih cantik dan elok untuk menyelesaikan masalah... Disini, macam mana teruk dan salahnye perbuatan seseorang itu, mereka akan memikirkan sebab yang paling berhemah dan positive untuk difikirkan bagi mencari penyelesaian, jauh sekali memilih jalan untuk bergaduh dan bermasam muka.. sekali sekala bila aku ada melepak rumah kakak senior final year dekat sini, lihat cara diorg selesai kan masalah dgn penuh hikmah dan berhemah aku sungguh kagum! 'sabar je.. Allah rancang utk kita macam ni sbb nak bagi pulangan yg lebih best.. nanti kite tak rase pulak sesuatu tu 'manis' kalo kita tak rase ujian dulu..' cakap mcm tu dgn senyuman.. :-) senyum je walopon masalah tu sgt2 berat dan dasyat.. 'takpe je org tu buat kita, adala sebabnye semua tu jadi.. mesti ada je petunjuk sebalik apa yang jadi.. kita tunggu je.. Allah kan syg kita..'

Hari tu aku ada lab group meeting, adala seorang mamat Singaporean ni missing in action, tak datang.. aku msg, call sume tak dapat.. ahli group aku yang lain ni takda seorg pon yang nak sakit hati atau berfikiran negative.. dalam group aku ni ada budak Arab, Israel, Oman.. (muslims+nonmuslims) masing2 cakap, 'nevermind, he must be sick..let he rest.. don't bother him..'
budak ni, buat macam ni berulang2.. kalau datang pon lambat.. tapi sehingga ke hari ini.. takda seorg pon cakap sesuatu yang tak puas hati...even bila supervisor kitorg tanye pon, semua org back up dia kata dia kurang sehat.. padahal, mamat tu sendiri mengaku die tertido.. huhuhu.. takda pon nak yang nak cakap, 'ko pikir ko je ngantuk?? aku ni tak ngantuk??' lagi sorang ahli group aku ni pulak.. mamat ni punye la pemalu ke ape.. bercakap pon siket2 je.. pastu dalam lab report kitorang tu, dia punye contribution pun sgt3 siket.. buat conclusion je.. hehehe.. tapi, siket pon takda yang bersuara atau sakit hati.. setiap orang fikirkan sesuatu yang sangat positive.. mereka lagi suke mengelak dari mencari salah orang lain!!! atau pon dalam erti kata lain, takda mase cari salah orang.. banyak lagi perkara penting utk difikirkan.. masing2 kata.. 'It's ok.. everyone have their own problems.. Let he just do what he can, and we help him do the rest because we are happy team right!!!' masing2 senyum dan bergembira ketika berbuat kerja.. :-)

Lagi sekali aku berasa kagum dengan budi pekerti mereka di sini.. Mereka seperti memikirkan kemajuan diri dan tolong menolong sesame manusia, lebih dari segala2 nya.. Satu je dalam kepala mereka, 'aku sayang saudara seIslam ku lebih dari sayang diriku sendiri kerana dengan begitu, Allah akan sayangkan ku'.. dan yang lebih terharu, yang bukan Islam pon, budi pekerti sgt3 baik... masing2 lebih suka berfikir kehadapan daripada menyemak kan otak dengan perkara remeh..

Baru2 ni ada masalah berlaku kepada rakanku di malaysia.. rakan aku tu, aku akui dia bersalah dan tidak sedikit pon aku menyebelahi dia.. Hanya aku kurang suka dengan cara mereka menyindir2 di status fb, jatuh kan maruah org lain sbb obviously mereka yg sekelas akan tahu sape yg dimaksudkan.. smpai rakan aku tu mengadu menangis2 bagi tahu aku masalah dia.. 'ain, sori kacau ko dan menyemak kan ko dgn masalah aku, tapi aku betol2 rase macam anjing tepi jalan sekarang ni'... aku yang semakin sensitif sekrg ni pon, smpai menangis dengar.. teruk sgt ni, smpai aku yg jauh ni dijadikan tmpat mengadu..

ye.. mungkin dia bersalah!

But don't you have heart?? don't you think about Allah.. who are you to penalize others??.. Are you that good??... Don't you have any other fairly option?

bagi aku marah2 dengan menggunakan tanda seru di fb menyindir org lain, maybe akan buat org yg tulis tu puas hati, tapi di mata org yg membacanye, it shows how LOW you can get..
When you started to mention it in public, don't blame others if the news spread by the wind..

Takde keluarga kah rakan aku itu sampai dengan beraninye memperlakukan macam tu kat anak orang..?? kalau aku la yang kena, rasanya abg2 & kakak2 aku yang agak brutal tu takkan berdiam diri kot.. dulu mase penah salah faham dgn seseorg pon, puas pulak nak tahan adik-bradik aku dari bertindak.. huhuhuhu... brutal family ku ini.. :-)

sedikit teguran yang aku suarakan supaya masalah diselesaikan antara yg terlibat sahaja secara elok dan berhemah, dah kena hentam dan dituduh penyebok, macam baik sgt, poyo la dia ni, macam dulu dia tak pernah dalam situasi ni... tergelak aku dengar.. dapat pulak msg tibe2 mengucapkan terima kasih.. bila tanye kenape, dia kata sebab aku bantu menyelesaikan masalah mereka.. aku tersenyum lagi sekali sebab obviously bukan itu maksud pengirim msg itu.. aku tahu.. tapi takpe la.. let it be that way.. :-)

mungkin bagi dia aku ni penghasut kawan aku tu, sebab mereka tak berbaik pon.. jadi, untuk ape berterima kasih tu?? sedangkan pergaduhan tu x selesai pon sehingga sekrg, jadi ape maksud tersirat di sebalik terima kasih tu..?? sindir aku? tapi, buat apa nak balas balik kan... kalau berbalas2, takkan ada penghujung pon dan aku pon sekali tak ubah seperti dia.. senyum dan sabar je perkara yang bole aku buat setakat ni.. lagipon, bukan hal aku.. :-)

Bila kadang2 hati rase tak sabar, sepotong ayat ni aku pegang..

"Obey Allah and His Messenger and do not dispute with one another,
otherwise you will fail and lose your strength.
Have patience - Allah is with those who are patient."
(Al-Anfal, 46)

Aku tahu mereka yang terlibat pastiiiiiii baca blog aku.. tahu sangat.. tak kesah nak kata aku ni perasan, penyebok, poyo, perasan alim & tahu semua benda atau nak tunjuk baik ke ape.. But, this is who I am now.. I am trying to let people I know and those I barely know to feel the bonding of sisters in Islam.. Rasa manisnya dan leganya hati bila kita sentiasa berlapang dada dan berbuat baik sesama manusia terutama orang yang kita kenal dan berada di sekeliling kita.. tapi bila cubaan aku itu di salah tafsir, aku yang agak kurang sabar & masih lemah yang bole bila2 mase je melenting dan sekaligus jadi orang yang di benci Allah.. dengan langkah berjaga2, aku berhenti setakat itu.. sebelum terjerumus dalam pergaduhan yg tak masuk akal & buang masa sekaligus dibenci oleh Nya, aku berhenti.. buang dia dari fb frens bukan maksudnye aku benci, tapi untuk mengelak jadi benci.. :-)
fikir2 kan la.. kita sendiri ni jauh sgt3 untuk sampai kepada kesempurnaan.. kalau asyik melihat dan nampak kesalahan orang lain, sampai bila2 kita takkan perasan kekurangan sendiri..

The love that is mention by Him is not the love that we can easily
say without knowing its own meaning..

WASSALAM.. :-)

With Love,






Wednesday, March 24, 2010

~Sedarlah Malaysia!!~

Dah lama tak tulis blog meluah kan perasaan.. Hari ni, aku terpanggil untuk menulis untuk melahirkan rasa sedih yang teramat sangat dalam diri ni..

Ya Allah Ya tuhanku.. Kau linduingilah hamba-hambamu ini Ya Allah.. aku bukan hambamu yang sempurna, tapi tunjuk kan lah aku ke jalan kebenaran, jalan yang diredhaiMu Ya Allah.. Tunjukkan la juga jalan yang lurus kepada saudara-saudara seagamaku di tanah air ku yang tercinta Ya Allah.. Bumi Malaysia..

Semalam, aku dapat email dari Malaysian Community of Old Trafford (MCoT) kat Manchester ni.. email tu mencerita kan tentang kejadian di Malaysia yang sedang berlaku sekarang.. Aku menangis.. menitik air mata ini memikirkan kejadian di negara sendiri yang rata-rata nya beragama Islam.. Ya Allah, ape sudah jadi???

Seramai 17,303 anak luar nikah di daftar kan pada tahun 2009!!! Itu yang di daftar! yang kene buang kat longkang, tepi jalan, dalam semak, dalam mangkuk tandas, dalam sungai bnyk mana pula???? Sedihhh.. sedihhh.... Macam ni rupenya keadaan di negara ku yang majority nye, umat Islam?? Macam ni ke???

Kenapa semua ini berlaku??? Kenapa???

Ya Allah... Hanya kau yang maha mengetahui segala sesuatu...

Zina jadi perkara BIASA... Buang baby, yang juga seorang insan yang sudah cukup sifat, yang sudah di tiup kan roh ke dalam jasadnya, yang mungkin bakal menjadi seorang yg membawa cahaya kebenaran pada generasi akan datang, DIBUANG-BUANG macam tu je???

Astaghfirullahalazim...

Cukup segala sifat, comel, montel.. tapi terbaring layu atas jalan di penuhi darah2...
binatang ke manusia ni????

demi nak tutup malu, takutkan tohmahan orang atas dunia, kau sanggup gadai kan kedudukan kau di sisi ALLAH SWT... dah tahu buat salah berzina, jadi pembunuh pulak???

aku memang tahu, kes buang anak, lahirnye anak luar nikah ni semua memang dah berleluasa lama di Malaysia.. Tapi, bila baca sendiri statistik yang di lapor kan tu (17,303)... hati ini hancur luluh!!! itu untuk 2009.. 2010 ni tak tahu la macam mane.. budak darjah 6, dah pandai cakap perkara lucah.. budak tingkatan 1, dah lahirkan anak luar nikah.. mana silapnya...

Seperti yang aku cakap tadi.. aku bukan manusia sempurna... aku bukan manusia istimewa yang terlepas dari buat dosa.. aku bukan maksum yang berdarjat tinggi di sisi Allah SWT.. Tapi, selagi otak ini maseh berakal, maseh sehat, maseh diberi nikmat dari Allah SWT dengan kesedaran untuk berasa sedeh mendengar perkara seperti ini, aku meluah kan perasaan di sini..

Tolong la sayangku... adik-adikku... saudara-saudaraku... Jaga lah diri.. Takut lah kepada Penciptamu yang satu.. Ingat la orang-orang tuamu.. mak dan ayah.. adik beradik.. tak sayang ke kepada keluarga sendiri?? jaga lah hati mereka..

Maka celakalah orang yang solat, iaitu orang-orang yang lalai terhadap solatnya.. (Al-Ma'un:4-5)

Apa maknanya??? asalkan seseorang itu solat, tapi lalai terhadap solatnya pun dikata kan CELAKA.. Apetah lagi zina yang di bangga-banggakan, dan membunuh nyawa-nyawa yang tidak berdosa??? (lalai ni, contohnya, melambat2 kan solat, tak khusyu' ke.. )

Aku takuttttt...
Rasanya belom pernah aku mendapat nikmat khusyu' dalam solat tu.. aku selalu melambat2 kan solat.. Selalu terpikir perkara lain ketika mengadap Allah ketika solat.. MasyaAllah.. Ampun kan dosa ku Ya Allah... semoga di jauh kan aku dari golongan yang celaka itu..

Tapi....

kenapa di negara sendiri jadi macam ni.. kenapa..

kenapa nyawa manusia di buat main??? kenapa perkara keji jadi keseronokan???

Aku sangat-sangat bersyukur datang sini.. datang bumi UK ni.. datang dibumi yang dikira asing sebagai seorang Islam jika dibandingkan di negara sendiri yang dipenuhi masyarakat Islam.. Tapi di sini, pengisian rohani tak payah nak cari.. melambak depan mata... Talk tentang kesedaran Islam ada di sana-sini.. masing-masing berkejar-kejaran mencari kelapangan untuk menuntut ilmu.. bukan sahaja akademik, tetapi juga Ilmu akhirat.. Tak dapat nak keluar dari bilik sebab coursework yang menimbun, talk online pun ada.. email-email tentang current issues memenuhkan inbox setiap hari.. masing2 berpesan2 sesama sendiri di sini.. masing-masing mengambil berat sesama sendiri.. sesuatu yang aku tak dapat dulu ketika belajar di Malaysia.. dengki sesama manusia melebihi segala-galanya.. perkara remeh di utamakan, di besar-besarkan.. (bukan semua k.. ramai je yg baik, prihatin.. especially sume yg menjadi bestfren aku.. :-) just nak bagi tahu pengalaman je..)

di sini? aku dapat merasakan kasih sayang sesama manusia..
Sayang sesama saudara seIslam, sayang kerana Allah SWT...
dulu aku tak faham apa maksud sayang kerana Allah SWT...
sekarang aku dah faham... manisnya perasaan itu.. :-)

Alhamdulillah...

Terima kasih atas nikmat mu yang tak terhingga ini Ya Allah..

Semoga usaha kami diberkati.. dan sentiasa berada di landasan Mu Ya Allah..

amin...

With Love,

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

~For the sake of Your Life~


This is what I got from my inbox from someone and feel worth to share:


A recent case happened in Britain...
A girl went to her friends house and she ended up staying longer than
planned, and had to walk home alone. She wasn't afraid because it was a small COMMUNITY and she lived only a few blocks away.. As she walked along under the bike trail Amina asked ALLAH to keep her safe from harm and danger. When she reached the alley, which was a short cut to her house, she decided to take it. However, halfway down the alley she noticed a man standing at the end as though he were waiting for her.

She became uneasy and began to recite a dua, asking for ALLAH's protection. Instantly a comforting feeling of quietness and security wrapped round her, she felt as though someone was walking with her. When she reached the end of the alley, she walked right past the man and arrived home safely.

The following day, she read in the newspaper that a young girl had been raped in the same alley just twenty minutes after she had been there.Feeling overwhelmed by this tragedy and the fact that it could have been her, she began to weep.Thanking ALLAH for her safety and to help this young woman, she decided to go to the police station. She felt she could recognize the man, so she told them her story.The police asked her if she would be willing to look at a lineup to see if she could identify him.. She agreed and immediately pointed out the man she had seen in the alley the night before. When the man was told he had been identified, he immediately broke down and confessed.

The officer thanked AMINA for her bravery and asked if there was anything they could do for her.She asked if they would ask the man one question. Amina was curious as to why he had not attacked her. When the policeman asked him, he answered,

'Because she wasn't alone. She had two tall men walking on either side of her...'

Amazingly, whether you believe or not, you're not alone.

ALLAH is always there in your heart and loves you no matter what

'If you deny me in front of your friends,
I shall deny you on the day of Judgement'

STAND UP FOR HIM!!!

It is said that when the angel of death is taking the rooh (soul) out of the body whom passes away....it is a painful experience. They say that when the dead awake on Qayaamat, the effect of the rooh being taken out will still be there. Therefore, ALLAH has told us to recite the Ayatul Kursi after any Farz salaat and it is stated that whoever recites this, their rooh will be taken out as you would take out a strand of hair from a pile of flour.. How light would that feel, MashaAllah! May Allah save us from any sort of pain and may He let us die with Imaan in our hearts and save us from the azaab..

There is no word as beautiful as Allah.
No example as beautiful as Rasulallah (SAW),
No lesson as beautiful as Islam
No song as melodious as Azan.
No charity as meaningful as Zakat.
No encyclopaedia as perfect as Al Quran.
No prayer as perfect as Namaz.
No diet as perfect as fasting.
No journey as perfect as Hajj.
Let's realize that Islam is for ever beautiful and perfect

This is most common among us.....
most of us talk during Azan...
The Holy Prophet (SAW) said, Stop doing everything during the Azaan
even reading the Quran, the person who talks during the Azaan will not
be able to say the Kalima AShahada on his/her death bed....

Please pass this message to Muslims...Anyone who read this blog, please pass this like what I did.. Let's all of us grab the opportunity of helping our very own religion and spread out the words.. as ALLAH already promised us in the Holy Quran :

You who believe! If you help God,
He will help you and make your feet firm.
(Surah Muhammad: 7)
May we're among those who received the light and guidance from ALLAH all the way until the final day.. the day of meeting HIM.. InsyaALLAH..

With Love,

Thursday, February 25, 2010

~I'm just scared~


In the name of Allah, The Beneficent, The Merciful..

O Allah I'm scared..

You'd gave me everything I desired in this life.. at least until now.. As your servant, I am pleased.. I'm happy yet petrified as I know every people will be confronted by any kind of test from Allah to diminish their former sins and to make them realize in every single day what the purpose of life.. As stated in HIS holy Quran, there is no easy way to be rewarded JANNAH..

I just scared to be me.. The lucky me.. I've been blessed by a perfect family who always be by my side in any situations.. The loved one who is perpetually waiting for me regardless of my weaknesses.. Friends, true friends who willingly share my felicity and misery.. I am here now, the place I dream to be.. The place where I want to gain as much knowledge as I can.. Even it nearly end of my 2nd year in The University of Manchester, I still can't believe the building I saw last year in the undergraduate prospectus book is the building that I see everyday on my way to school!!! Subhanallah...



O Allah.. I'm obliged..

I'm not the one that You can be proud of.. I am NOT yet.. But I am trying.. Please show me the way.. Thank you for answering all my prayers.. And the current miracle is my results.. The results I received last Thursday is not what I expected.. It was NOT good.. and it was not bad either.. From my effort, I couldn't get that marks.. I was really effortless in my previous semester.. But I prayed for the best and hope Allah grant my wish to give me miracle this time.. Give me one more chance to proceed my journey in this beautiful place and I promise to work much more harder after this.. and... HE let me see the miracle!! again.. Thank you Allah.. You love me so much.. But.. what have I done for You in return??? nothing..

Above all this I'm terrified..

Life is not a delightful fantasy but reality.. It is the real examinations on the stage called world..It will be one day.. The day I'll face the tremendous test from HIM... Everyday, I smile to be born as Nurulain Baharuddin.. But, at the same time I'll hear voices from the bottom of my heart reminding me not easily drown in comfortableness and always be prepared for obstacles waiting ahead.. The results of the hardship that will accompany me in the hereafter... The moment when we meet the Lord of this universe... It is to him we belong and to him is our final return.

I'm just scared..

But, we are not alone.. He's always there with us.. He listen our prayers..


Just remember, everything that happens
in life must have its own lesson,
even though we sometimes fail to figure them out...


With Love,

Friday, January 29, 2010

~Always be grateful for what we have~



There's a story about one of us in here.. a person who has HIS blessed to pursue his study in UK as a medical student.. a person who have determination in fighting for his own life.. The story that touches deep down my heart and made me realized the power of our creator in planning the different story line for every one of us in this world..

This is the reality for what life is all about.. Everyone of us have their own path in life, and so do I.. But what ever your path is, whether it'd been the way you are hoping for or the other way around, always thank HIM.. HE knows everything beyond our mind can ever think.. Just remember that, it must be 'hikmah' behind everything..

'A minute you're on top of the world, but by the
next blink of the eye, here you are, as low as you can get.'

quote from him that I remember the most..

This life is temporary and there's an immortal life waiting ahead.. Don't be so proud when you're on top and don't blame anything that is destined by fate when you are going through difficulties in life..

I am so proud of him and what he becoming after this tremendous test.. he's trying his best to face the toughest reality and he have shown me the meaning of being the true servant that never complaints of what ALLAH had decreed upon us.. I wish I could be like him if i'm in his shoes.. let's all the reader who read this entry, pray for him.. There's nothing we can do other than pray for his happiness and may his patience in accepting this fate will be rewarded by ALLAH SWT.. HE knows best..

amin..


for those who want to read further story about him, you can go to this BLOG

With Love,